Sunday, November 30, 2008

the space between here and there


Tonight is the last night my Grandma will be in her own home. The shadows in her head are just ghosts of her memories. I can see her wanting to remember, trying to understand, and then just somehow...not. Dementia is not my friend. I miss my Gram. When my sisters and I left her house on Thanksgiving after a short visit, I only wanted one thing...and that was for her to say my name. But it didn't happen. It took a lot for me to not cry. I was so glad to take this one last visit on Thanksgiving day with my two sisters, whom I love larger than life. So tomorrow, the red brick rambler will be empty...except for Grandpa's cussing, Gram's bacon frying, Suzie's yipyap, the grand kids feet, the trail 90's engine, the train horns, the coo-coo clock, Dallas on TV, and the sound of lucky charms hitting a glass bowl. Good luck in your new digs Gram...we are sure you will have the time of the rest of your life!

2 comments:

Abbie + Justin said...

What a great picture of you and Gram! She really does look happy. It will be a strange thing to think that the house will be empty, but never forgotten. I love all the memories you have. I love that I have memories there too, and lots of them took place before I even knew Justin. :) Seems like time goes by so fast. I can't imagine what it feels like when you are nearing the end of your road. She has lots to be proud of. I'm always thankful to be a part of this family.

Toots said...

Ohhhhhhhh, Aim, that was just perfect. Thank you for your genuiness. Just the right words to hear. I loved the many memories you related from Lucky Charms to Grampa's cussing. I will always be so glad we went over that Thanksgiving day as sisters. I couldn't help but cry yesterday as I thought of the how Gram's house on 1232 W. Pleasant View Drive will now sit empty. Yet, we've filled it with so many good times, good Sunday visits and holiday gatherings to always remember.